war of the worlds is amusing

in about 7 hours i'll be old.
now i'm too tired to figure out how many seconds i've lived... perhaps later. haha. i'm also too tired to blog about what happened yesterday. oh well. sleep is important. when i'm tired.

and...

concert review in today's edition of LIFE! in the Straits Times! amusing.. =) yay.

me went swimming. and got sunburnt. boink. pretty skies today.. nice clouds and brilliant sun and mesmerising shade of blue. wheee~

oh i've decided that this week shall be holiday-ish. meaning i'll slack and go out and have fun. er... kinda. wheee. i is a lazy piggy. age! it's catching up on me! [the birds! the birds! they mark the spot!] boingboing.

arh... why is it so humid.

the last weekend was a very artsy one. 2 band concerts (one of which i spent on stage) and a ballet. all were enjoyable events. though i find the auditorium at NYP lousy. while i was there i remember that some of the SYFs was held there. and i wondered how the judges made the scoring decisions. since everything sounds muffled in that hall. there seemed to be a force-field/wall in front og the stage. and i vaguely remember performing on that stage as well. was it SYF as well? probably. shrug. i like the concert hall at the esplanade. think i'm becoming spoilt. lala. but things sound crystal-clear in that hall. including mistakes. stress myself out. you'd think i'm so used to performing that i won't get stage fright/nervesss/etc. well i don't think i get stage fright. but adrenaline still pumps like mad. and brain gears up. [can jx go into SEED mode? wonders.] acoustics. zzz.

oh i got my pay. bank account balance increased over the weekend. hm.
money is such a bother.

what will tomorrow bring?

king salmon from norwegi

thanks Amy and PX for the nice dinner and cake and present.. =) it was very unexpected and me is very touched... hmm.. and i have overactive tear ducts. [so it was good i had to open it at home] haha nvm. thanks dears. =) the waiter must think that i'm very childish. haha... oh well. other than thank you i don't know what else i should say. ..

i'm still a bit crazy, so...


trying to singe my eyebrow.

love, as i understand it,

is altruistic.
but then again, is love to be understood?

i shouldn't blog now, i'm crazy.

w.h. auden -- the more loving one

Looking up at the stars, I know quite well
That, for all they care, I can go to hell,
But on earth indifference is the least
We have to dread from man or beast.

How should we like it were stars to burn
With a passion for us we could not return?
If equal affection cannot be,
Let the more loving one be me.

Admirer as I think I am
Of stars that do not give a damn,
I cannot, now I see them, say
I missed one terribly all day.

Were all stars to disappear or die,
I should learn to look at an empty sky
And feel its total dark sublime,
Though this might take me a little time.

troubled jx

and since when is jx not troubled by something or another. i'm not as good an escapist as i thought.

i suppose a person's wants and desires should be determined by his/her ability to achieve it. should desires be restricted by whether they can be achieved? because it is pointless to want something you can never have. or is it not. and what's the point of wanting things? there are things that can wait. there are also things that cannot. there are one-time opportunities, chances, whatever else. and there are things that become meaningless past a certain time-frame. are we not free to want because we are bound by impossibilities? i mean, sure you can want all you like, but you'll never get the things you want, and you're just making yourself miserable over everything. this second-rate life you have no choice but to endure. and if we are not free to dream after all, what's the point of anything? are there no boundless possibilities? no you'll-get-there-eventually-s? there are things i can wait for. but i don't have an abundance of time. i'm growing old. wasting my life away. and i do not know what i really want anymore.

i was wrong to have wanted something i cannot have.
i am wrong to want anything i cannot have.

all it does is just to make me miserable.

happenings.

finally i get to donate blood. today. properly. same arm same vein. but vein held throughout the process... and didn't do anything weird. hmm. wheee~ gloop gloop blood. hmmm. and the person who poked 14G needle into me arm was very nice. haha... was rather amused actually. and i got a TY beanie baby dotty doggy! [for photo of dotty see jh's blog] yay. no haematoma. so there. zzz...

without fail i'll have ulcers the week before i have a concert. concert week ulcers. argh. disgusting. am putting smelly medicine on them. yuk. ulcers are evil. and consecutive evenings of rehearsals are an act of self-mutilation. haha..

watching SEED and SEED DESTINY concurrently messes my brain up. kind of. but i've finished SEED liao. yay. currently i think that anime voice-actors are talented people. exciting. ladidah... amusement.

weird. nowadays [this month and maybe the next] i seem to want to watch many movies. i wonder how many of them i will get to watch. hmm... why are movies so expensive. sigh. ah well.

how i miss the sensation of pen racing across paper.

as for age catching up on me, i just hope my telomeres hold out. =)

-i just want to crawl into the land of pillows with you and stay there forever-

today

i can feel age catching up on me...

i have no feet

foot facts

why are there so many bones in the human foot. half the bones of the skeleton are accounted for in the feet?! how scary-fascinating. tralala... i wonder what damage i've been causing to my feet... self-inflicted ailments. standing long hours many days in a row. the pain. on normal days the average human doesn't really stand for long periods of time. only a bit here and there. mostly sitting i think. hmm..

i think i need sleep. shall go get some now.

"...but i'm a spider! i have eight legs! not two legs like you. that means i need four pairs of shoes! that's eight shoes!..." -incy wincy spider [speaking with an aussie accent] in The Wheels of the Bus vol 2

bienvenue to

jingz
who succumbed, and started a blog. =]
hope you'll update regularly.. haha. save paper. save the earth. kinda. make yourself heard/read =]
wheee...

==

i've been
getting fat [eating non-stop]
making origami animals [かわいい]
tiring myself out [by standing for long hours]
feeling irritated [at certain irritating persons]
meeting people [old and new]
singing nursery rhymes [damn you blaring educational vids for toddlers! nursery rhymes are so twisted and evil; very disturbing]
thinking how important it is to have a good foundation in english. early. [it makes me very sad to hear things like "orling joo" and "twenty dollar" from 18-year-old people]

==

おやすみ

i'm fine.

i'm alive.
a surprise, really.
because i was melting in the heat today.
contemplated standing in a bucket.
shrug.

sigh

i suppose Gundam SEED DESTINY plays a part in making me depressed. but i like it anyway.

plus i'm working the whole day, and i don't get much time to myself. have to sleep. have to do this do that everything. for a few dollars an hour i sold my time and freedom.
shrug.

whatever.

like anyone is reading this.

my french is dying II

well, it is. i'm so sad.
believe me.

have been working... at book fairs. of the Popular kind. (westmall) long hours. tiring. and these 2 days just nice i'm free from book fairs i've been teaching secondary school kids the tenor sax... at commonwealth sec (which, incidently, is in jurong). 09h30 to 17h30. i think sec ones are a headache... haha.. either super playful and cheeky or super nervous and timid and stressed or super full of themselves. aiyoh. kaboink. hmm last 2 hours of teaching tomorrow (13h00 to 15h00) and i'll have earned $250. rrright. going to work (some more) at new book fair (northpoint) in the evening. northpoint fair from 9-15 june. talk about timing. which means by the 15th i'll have clocked in 10 consecutive days of work. zzz... but i'm happy i can wake up late tomorrow, though. sighz.

well... that's all for now.. see whether i have energy to blog tomorrow. bleh.

dumpling count : 2