i wonder...

if the government is aware of what's written behind the seats at the back of buses. can social problems be diagnosed from those bits of vandalism?

if time heals wounds [or is dettol needed]

how i can have my cake and eat it too.
how to have the best of both worlds.
how i can make more friends.

if i'll ever watch a movie at the yangtze cinema =p

why i write so badly.
why i'm so tired.
why this scary half-naked fat guy keeps sending msgs on friendster. urrrr

what my immune system is up to.

please

get the bacteria / virus / monster out of me NOW

je suis nain. nain jardin.

i remember
exile
darkness
warmth
love
proximity
music
secrets
laughter
escape
belonging

i believe
things will get better
things lost can be regained
forever is attainable
there will be enough time
dreams can become reality
i will be free
happiness is possible

i hope
you'll be happy
we can understand each other again
tomorrow will be a better day

...

just wondering what this week will bring.
perhaps nothing.

20 September 2006

YIH, NUSSU, Arts Co-Op -
terms I don't belong to - terms uttered
only in kind, abbreviated justifications
of my existence in a place
I shouldn't be, a place that feels
strangely like home.

I am a passer-by,
content to remain anonymous
until I enter your presence.

this afternoon, in your company, under
strong vents of artificial climate
in a corner of a members-only area, I decided
I didn't need the jargon that
summarises my preclusion.

so I cast it aside,
unspoken, unforgotten,
only to discover
a wordless need to
be held.

post-concert

3 Sundays without rehearsal... yay means can go grandma house, which i haven't been doing in weeks and weeks. *feels bad* oh well..

thanks all who came for the concert =]

Impetus + Inertia

= Schizophrenia

My brain permanently damaged has been by rehearsals irritating that are. Still don't understand how Impetus and Inertia can coexist in a single wave of the baton.

Urgh.

Yee-Haa!

too much banana causes diarrhoea

taking up arms only to lay them down again : baring

the results of my months-long (self) (cross-) examination are out.

and so i've identified the problems. yet, somehow it's difficult to do anything about them. surprisingly so. perhaps due to various external factors i've come to think of as hostile. hence. unless i somehow change my perception of these people and things and happenings and stop fearing, i'm still on the path to downfall. and things will only worsen.

[it's ok if you have no idea what i'm talking about or why i'm saying it. it's probably not very apparent to anyone outside the bubble but of late certain things have been going downhill shrug]


bubble

bubbles are such pretty things aren't they. and i suppose a large part of their beauty stems from their extremely short lifespan. something tantalising about them. interesting to behold. fragile beyond imagination. how about making bubbles that last longer? then they would look pretty for a longer period of time. but would people get tired of their longer-lasting beauty? would people get bored of them? would they lose their beauty and attraction? perspectives are different from the inside of the bubble. living in the comfort of a bubble, all one wants is for the bubble to last for as long as it possibly can, to live happily ever after inside this light and flimsy and iridescent world, to float above and over the sights and happenings of the outside-reality. should we try to prolong the lifespan of the bubble? should we invest energy in making the molecules of our lives coexist in harmony? how should we weather the storms that threaten to tear apart the translucent fabric of our dreams?

thankfully bubbles are patient.


looking back ahead

i guess it's time to rebuild those walls.

Randomness

Attended a book launch on Saturday. I've never been to one before that so I had no idea what to expect but it was quite interesting and nice cos they did readings yum yum I think we should support local writers so that they have incentive and motivation to improve their works yay poems are good for the health so we should produce/read more poems oh there were yummy brownie-bits too but the chwee kueh was bouncy [ask jh] haha so exciting I think I should blog about the person sitting in the row in front of us who started making small talk I don't think she really appreciates the poetry [or can think critically about them] and she's just there for "business opportunities" whatever they are and she asked me whether I was going to buy any of the books maybe I look very un-cultured so perhaps that was why she said (in a knowing and superior manner) "don't want to spend money right" to me when I said I wasn't going to buy the books yet as if she was going to buy all of them [she didn't; I saw her guzzling the yummy food outside] sigh people like that are so tiresome but we shall not care about them and write more poems and promote the arts and hopefully they'll all become more open-minded and big-hearted haha and that summarised my exciting weekend which reminds me this week I have

1 Test +
2 Assignments due on Friday +
1 Tutorial to Attempt +
4 Tuition Sessions +
1 Rehearsal +
1 Concert

All in one week!
*boink*
Can't wait for the week to be over. Bleh.
But the good thing is probably that I'll have no time to think about horrible people and things and whatever randomness/chaos/purestupidity pah.

I know only about 5 people actually read this blog, but
PLEASE COME CONCERT!!! =P



Your support will be much appreciated.

Archery is interesting in that it causes asymmetrical muscle aches. I like asymmetry, hence I like archery.

Whee.

Hmm.. Time to mug for test.
Hope I don't fall asleep during tuition later.

PHASE I : INITIATED

Philwinds + PhilYouth Concert @ SCH
16 September 2006
7pm
$15

10 toes, 9 toenails.

Zzz...

PAH

Jiaxin -- [noun]: A dance involving little to no clothing 'How will you be defined in the dictionary?' at QuizGalaxy.com

Taiyaki Bliss

luckily i managed to regain my composure before i swan eyebrow.
whee~
yummy taiyaki.
*loves*